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Class Reunion
Every ten years,
as summertime nears,
An announcement
arrives in the mail,
A reunion is
planned; it'll be really grand;
Make plans to
attend without fail.
I'll never forget
the first time we met;
We tried so hard
to impress.
We drove fancy
cars, smoked big cigars,
And wore our most
elegant dress.
It was quite an
affair; the whole class was there.
It was held at a
fancy hotel.
We wined, and we
dined, and we acted refined,
And everyone
thought it was swell.
The men all
conversed about who had been first
To achieve great
fortune and fame.
Meanwhile, their
spouses described their fine houses
And how beautiful
their children became.
The homecoming
queen, who once had been lean,
Now weighed in at
one-ninety-six.
The jocks who
were there had all lost their hair,
And the
cheerleaders could no longer do kicks.
No one had heard
about the class nerd
Who'd guided a
spacecraft to the moon;
Or poor little
Jane, who's always been plain;
She married a
shipping tycoon.
The boy we'd
decreed "most apt to succeed"
Was serving ten
years in the pen,
While the one
voted "least" now was a priest;
Just shows you
can be wrong now and then.
They awarded a
prize to one of the guys
Who seemed to
have aged the least.
Another was given
to the grad who had driven
The farthest to
attend the feast.
They took a class
picture, a curious mixture
Of beehives, crew
cuts and wide ties.
Tall, short, or
skinny, the style was the mini;
You never saw so
many thighs.
At our next
get-together, no one cared whether
They impressed
their classmates or not.
The mood was
informal, a whole lot more normal;
By this time we'd
all gone to pot.
It was held
out-of-doors, at the lake shores;
We ate
hamburgers, coleslaw, and beans.
Then most of us
lay around in the shade,
In our
comfortable T-shirts and jeans.
By the fortieth
year, it was abundantly clear,
We were
definitely over the hill.
Those who weren't
dead had to crawl out of bed,
And be home in
time for their pill.
And now I can't
wait; they've set the date;
Our fiftieth is
coming, I'm told.
It should be a
ball, they've rented a hall
At the Shady Rest
Home for the old.
Repairs have been
made on my hearing aid;
My pacemaker's
been turned up on high.
My wheelchair is
oiled, and my teeth have been boiled;
And I've bought a
new wig and glass eye.
I'm feeling quite
hearty, and I'm ready to party
I'm gonna dance
'til dawn's early light.
It'll be lots of
fun; But I just hope that there's one
Other person who
can make it that night.
(This
was sent to me via email-I did not write it)
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